Wednesday, July 30, 2008

looking forward but standing still

I don't drive and therefore I spend time walking through out my day. A few years ago when returning from the store I had the sensation of peace behind my back but in front of me was a struggle, difficult to move forward like there was an invisible wall in front of me. In the far, far, far distance there were open spaces but I could not move forward or I was moving forward ever so slowly. At this time I heard the Lord say you can not continue to move forward with all that baggage you are carrying, you must surrender it and lay it down. Once again I find myself unable to move forward while behind me seems ever so peaceful. Again the Lord is saying that I can not continue until I lay it down and leave it down. It wasn't until now that I realized that I had moved some distance from that place I was in a few years ago. I knew then and I know now that running back is not the answer. Turning to the left or the right is not the answer. I am to stand and let the Lord search me and do as He says- lay down all that is not of Him, Repent (deeper than I have done in the past), trust and wait for further direction. I see that there is stuff that I have been trying to hide. Having it exposed in this way is painful and I am having difficulty yielding. Having the Lord and others seeing me for what I really am is frightening. Yet I don't think I am fooling anyone but myself...Obviously Jesus knows me and I know many times I have seen things in others that they seemed surprised by when they finally see it in themselves...so certainly people are seeing what I think is hidden in me. I am a little shaky about this part of the journey but at the same time I know that the same Lord Jesus who saw me through in the past will see me through again.

6 comments:

Plant Lady said...

Debrah,

All of us have areas in our lives that we know we must change but are afraid to admit to and that they are ugly. The enemy likes to remind us of the ugliness and tries to make us believe that we are not worthy of God's love or forgiveness. I once saw a movie entitled, The Devil's Advocate, starring Al Pachino and Keanu Reeves. In it, the devil (Al Pachino) tries to influence a young lawyer (Keanu Reeves) by giving him great success in the courtroom and wealth beyond belief, but the whole plot of the movie was about how "appealing to one's vanity" is the devil's greatest strategy for winning a soul. Contrast that to the way God wins souls. God is no respector of persons. He does not care about one's position, wealth, or even the pretty or ugly areas of one's life. He accepts them as they are and then when they are received unto Him - He "cleans out the trash" so to speak.

My point is this: If there are areas in your life that you know are problems for you - Admit it out loud to God (He already knows) and to yourself (Deep down you know it too) and don't let the enemy appeal to your vanity (the most effective tool, I think, in his arsenal.

God is forgiving, and most people that know you will be too. Those who are not are not walking in the Way, because God tells us that we must forgive to be forgiven.

My husband always asks me when I am feeling upset by someone's harsh, critical remarks or judgements, if I really value their opinion. I have come to realize that those who do this trying to "tear down" instead of "build up" are on the enemy's team and I surely don't value their opinion!

Debrah, I pray that you will find the courage that Christ has already given you to take that HUGE first step of many as you walk ever so closer to Him.

This is indeed spiritual warfare and in Ephesians Chapter 6 it says when we have on the whole armor of God and when we have done all we can,just STAND! God does the rest!

Be Blessed~
Plant Lady

Plant Lady said...

Debrah,

GOD IS AWESOME! I just popped over to dancingwallflowers blog after I had read and commented on your post. YOU WON'T BELIEVE HER POST TODAY!

Please check it out! Her site is:
1dancingwallflower.blogspot.com

Her post today is entitled, "I Can't See Me For Watching You".

Plant Lady

From the Heart said...

Debrah,
Plant Lady has covered everything so wonderfully. The only thing I would add is something our Founding Pastor told us years ago. He said that satan can put thoughts in your mind but he cannot read your mind. So when your praying for deliverance of any kind and using Jesus' name you should do this out loud so the enemy can hear you. You are covered by the blood of Jesus and he cannot cross that blood line. Whatever the baggage is let the enemy know that your laying it down in Jesus' name and tell him to flea. God bless you and give you the peace that you so deserve. Don't let the enemy pull you down by putting thoughts in your mind.

We all take up things and then have to let them go and give them to Jesus. He wants to bear our burdens. That's why He died on the cross for all who will come to Him and put themselves at His feet.

God bless you and you will be in my prayers as you draw closer to God.
AliceE.

Lynn - JnL4God said...

Debrah
Plant Lady and Alice have covered you with everything I would say too. The only things I have to add is that you may not be where you need or want to be but Thank God you're not where you used to be. Keep you focus on God and down the road you'll look back and be able to say .. WOW! Love how far I've come.
It's not fun I had to reveal and heal myself, I'm sure we all do at times in our life, but rest assured God will never let you down.
Love,
Lynn

Kim said...

Debrah,
I sit here @ 6am checking my blog when I read yours I was moved to check out your blog. Sister I am simply blessed to have met you through the blog. The one thing I have learned through my Christian walk is that the Devil wants to steal and kill and destroy anything that is a part of God.
We all have things that come in our lives that separate our fellowship with God, but it is truly amazing when God speaks to us through a storm or small still voice yearning to fellowship with us, wanting that intimacy.
Intimacy will cost us laying down weights and burdens but ahhh the relief of knowing there is someone in the shadows waiting to love us and help us to a better way.
Take heart my friend, and know that God is a personal one and He sees you and wants to give you strength to face the difficult days. Let me know if you ever need me.
Much Prayers,
Kim

From the Heart said...

Thank you so much for your prayers for my daughter and family. There's been some unjust things done to my son-in-law. He is a strong Christian and this stronghold on him needs to be broken. I have so much faith in the prayers of the people on this Bible Study. So many prayers have been answered. I just know that if we bombard Heaven God will do something.
AliceE.